Note: this entry was written several months back and the story is incomplete. More to come soon.
Next note: no, this isn't an actual photo of our crashed vehicle. Rather, it is a symbol of what life felt like around here for a good, long while after Dave's accident.
I guess flexibility is key in life. It's either that or frustration, which I've experienced plenty of in my more inflexible moments. Especially this past year 'n a quarter or so. "Let go and let God" is taking on meaning for me, probably because I've had little to no control over the events of the past 15 months. For me, trying to make everything right has resulted in a lot of stress.
I used to be semi-immune to stress. It's not that hard to ignore stress - you just think about something else. Read a good book or go do something fun. In college there were times I failed or did very poorly on tests because I didn't want the stress of preparing for them or thinking about my grade. You could say I chose to disassociate from the consequences of things rather than face them. I preferred to live a carefree and free flowing existence, and most of the time that worked out for me. I'm a little amazed that I've lived for 41 years without learning some crucial life skills like self-discipline and time management.
About a year and two weeks ago, my husband was in an accident that has had far-reaching results. He was driving our mini-van on the freeway at about 55 mph when a guy in large pickup hit him from behind going at least 90 mph. How the guy didn't see the van in front of him, I'll never know. The van was totaled and DH had the kinds of back and neck injuries you'd expect from that type of collision. Nothing broken, but lots of chiropractic care needed. We figured it would take time, but that he would recover and be able to get back to work soon. His employer was very understanding, and he was allowed to do his work as a software developer from home.
However, about 6 weeks after the accident, he became very sick. He began throwing up violently every time he tried to eat. His esophagus swelled up, he got sores in his mouth, his stomach was like a ball of fire, his colon was in agony. For a month he ate nothing but watermelon, because that was the one thing that he could get past his throat and keep down. He lost around 60 pounds. The chiropractor assured us that this can be a normal result of an accident due to stress, pain and nerves being pinched and pulled due to spinal misalignment. DH began to see a gastroenterologist, who performed a number of invasive tests on him and diagnosed him with esophagitus, gastritis, hiatal hernia, reflux and colitis. He gave Dave some pills that, when we looked them up, predicted potential cancer and other risks greater than what Dave was already going through. So he declined, and we went on a search for natural remedies - diet, supplements, natural therapies, etc.
All this while DH was trying to work from home, and even tried to go back in to work. He no longer had the physical strength to do so, and would become even more stressed and ill and broken while trying to force himself. His physical pain was too great and he had lost the ability to concentrate and keep focus on anything. After nearly a year of patiently working around DH's issues, his company finally let him go. I think they deserve to be sainted for their kindness in giving him so much time and flexibility. Thank you, former employer!
Meanwhile I was researching all kinds of potential therapies and diets and such, many of which we have worked with this past year. Also, God sent us a perfect angel to help us - a lovely woman in another state who went through something very similar - a bad accident followed by complete bodily malfunction - and had spent years learning to overcome her accident injuries and the resulting illnesses. She has not only given us very wise and practical advice to follow for healing, but has even sent us some of the essentials that we couldn't afford to buy on DH's disability pay.
No comments:
Post a Comment